By David Roth
VERSE
I drag my suitcase down the hall,
Another day, another ball. 
Straight outta bed and off I go, 
My very favorite travel show.
I pop the bag, it's full of stuff,
I never quite unload enough. 
But I'll make room, I'll get a grip. 
I'm packing for my ego trip.
CHORUS
I'm packing for my ego trip.
I've got a lifetime membership.
I'm well rehearsed 
	and well-equipped.
I'm packing for my ego trip.
VERSE 
I'll start with pride and 
	self-esteem .
Eternal youth and fading genes, 
I always stuff some extra socks 
Right underneath my 
	writer's blocks. 
My shaving kit is six feet tall.* 
It holds the mirror on the wall 
Reflecting me, myself and I, 
My three most favorite passersby.
CHORUS
BRIDGE 
Today I'll start by 
	ending world hunger, 
Take a break for lunch and 
	win Olympic Gold. 
Just before my nap at three 
I'll sell a coupla million CD’s. 
My wing at the Smithsonian 
Is something to behold.
VERSE 
Sometimes I walk, 
Sometimes I drive.
Sometimes I crawl, 
Sometimes I fly. 
My travel agent loves me 
Cuz I'm tripping every minute. 
When I'm not in my right mind 
My left one's overflowing, 
And then I know I've gone way past 
My psyche's legal baggage limit.
CHORUS
TAG
I write the songs that 
	make the whole world sing, 
And you thought Elvis Presley 
	was the king!
*Optional line for female singer:
“My makeup kit is five feet tall.”